Fifty Shades of Grey The Movie

Surely this is just porn? I mean... it doesn't particularly have a story, it's just a string of pornographic- very graphic in fact - encounters of bondage and sex. its not really a love story, there's no mad man forcing this stuff on her, its just a girl who never had sex before losing her virginity to a bondage loving dominator who happens to be attractive, no?
Am I in any way wrong?
I'm sure the people out there who love it (and there are a surprising number of the affectionately named 'illiterates') are... well... not reading this blog, but if they were they'd probably arguing, telling me it's a beautiful love story that needs to be told on the big screen.
Of course; they'd be wrong.

Of course my readers will already know what I think of the twilight fan fiction named 'Fifty Shades of grey' that has been very generously called a 'book'. but while I was completely happy to leave it alone now that fewer people are reading it on the tube (only 2 noticeable people today) it appears to have come again into my field of vision in the form of an article in the newspaper speculating on which Hollywood actress will be in it.
The article said that it's going to be either Mila Kunis, Olivia Wilde, Jessica Pare, Emma Watson, Lucy hale, Leighton Meester, Amanda Seyfried or Sasha Grey. To which my immediate response is 'either its going to be none of them because none of them are porn stars (Sasha Grey used to be but from what Wikipedia says she isn't anymore) and the only way to make it would be to make a full on porno, because that's what it bloody well is. Or it will be one of them and the film is going to cut out all of the sex scenes because not a one of those actresses would be put on the big screen in a full on domination bdsm bondage porno.'
Don't get me wrong, I would love to see each and every one of those actresses in such positions, I'm a guy after all, every one of them are gorgeous and I'd even agree to see 50 shades the movie if I thought i'd see Emma Watson or Mila Kunis naked - I'm a pervert, what do you want from me? - but they wont. they're big, famous actresses, they don't need to do porn to get paid so why would they?

If I'm wrong fair enough I have a little less respect for whichever one does it. It just strikes me as a really bad idea to make a fifty shades of grey movie, unless they're making it with porn stars. From what I've seen the book barely has any more plot than a standard Porno.

Anyway. Rant over.

A-Gameofthrones-pre-season3-panel
- James

Thirteen Of Fifty-Two

TV-Shows

Game of Thrones

God I love this show. There is nothing else like it, and don't say Merlin or Robin hood, because they really don't compare. This show is brilliantly well made with an ass load of information and a massive, wide, impossibly cool world with so much lore that they had to create special animated sections to put in the Blu-ray/DVD just to get it in.

Originally written by George R. Martin, I've never actually read the books, but I love the show. While I have seen both the first and second seasons I don't want to talk too much about what either are about because it's relatively new adn people should go and watch it and may not have already.
I will say that the first series follows a lot of different stories;
Denaerys Targarian, the princess and heir of the old kingdom, who was married off to the leader of a savage Dothraki tribe.
Eddard Stark, last honourable man in the seven kingdoms, head of house stark, Lord of Winterfell and Warden of the North, After the pre-show death of Jon Arryn, the Hand of the King.
John Snow, Bastard son of Lord Stark, off to join the Night's watch, the guardians of the kingdom against the terrors of the north.
Bran Stark, second youngest son of Lord Stark.
Arya Stark, Youngest Daughter of Lord Stark, a very un-noble noble-woman who dreams of fighting with a sword, not with a sewing needle.
Tyrion 'The Imp' Lanister, dwarven son of the Lannister house. Intelligent, funny and likes to have sex... a lot. Also my favourite character, though he didn't make the of 52 list it was only because the list was full when I came to realise his awesomeness. While anyone who reads my work can attest I do like sword fights, but there’s something more interesting about the Dwarf who defeats all his foes through wordplay and clever political manoeuvring.
Rob Stark, eldest son of Lord Stark who rules in Winterfell while his father is in the South, acting as Hand of the King.
And a handful of others who take up less time to poke at little bits that need to be said.

The show, unlike most medieval set media, is not about fighting, it's there, but that's not the point. It's about politics, intellect, spying and, eventually, war and the strategy thereof. Watching this show you can't help but love half the characters while despising, yet respecting the rest.
And that's where I think the beauty of it lies. nothing is as it seems, nobody is who they appear to be. As the Guardian said; '...characters so venomous they could eat the Borgias.’

I think one of the other reasons I loved this series is because it had Sean Bean in it, but that's neither here nor there.

I have to say one thing, though; While Jamie is a bad man, a dick, an ass, etc... I can't help but feel sorry for him. He killed the last king, the mad king who everyone hated, but not once has he been praised for it. Not once has he been given credit, instead everyone looks down on him and calls him 'Kingslayer' in a derogatory tone because he did it by stabbing the mad king in the back.
Everyone wanted him dead, what does it matter if he was stabbed in the belly of the back?

Vidlicious - Oh Joss you make me laugh.
- James