All words presented in this blog are purely opinion, not fact - unless specifically stated otherwise in the post.

Monday 21 January 2019

Star Wars Episode 6: Comments

We also have Star Wars Episode 6

1. Episode 6, the 7th chronologically and 3rd to be made.

2. why did Vader arrive on that star destroyer I wonder. he has his own super star destroyer that he usually uses is my understanding.

3. someone probably should have told the commander when Lord Vader's shuttle left hyperspace, not waited for his ship to arrive on the death star.

4. Darth Vader, from hunter of Jedi to building manager.

5. Why is it that the builder of the first death star was all kitted out in nice high level imp gear but this one is just wearing identical clothing to other officers.

6. I feel like this scene is supposed to have translation subtitles but they forgot them.

7. Luke looks like a priest.

8. okay, so here is proof right here that robots in the SW universe feel pain, why else would they be torturing them? what is the purpose of giving a droid pain receptors?

9. where did Anakin get all those languages to teach 3-PO? or did that come later?

10. of all of the scenes that they added to the movies this one with the random musical number is the absolute least necessary and least welcome. what purpose does this serve? Other to detract from the bit where the girl gets dropped in the hole and eaten.

11. I never noticed before but that twilek has her boobs out. what rating is this film did you say?

12. So I'd like to point out here that Leia left the rebellion, the big galaxy saving organization that she was leading, to go save her boyfriend. that does not seem like the responsible thing to do.

13. She is not very good at stealth.

14. Wearing that mask constantly must be really stuffy.

15. maybe it woulda been smarter to transport him out quietly while people were sleeping and let solo out in a safer environment, one with doctors.

16. I feel like Jabba wouldn't want to risk having to fight the rebel alliance. he's just a smuggler, they're a military and now he has 2 of their generals captive.

17. I can't tell, when the guard stumble back are they clutching their throats cos Luke's choking them or are they saluting?

18. that outfit of Leia's does not look comfortable.

19. that must be really embarrassing for Leia being almost naked like that in front of her brother.

20. shame luke doesn't consider using his force persuade on the rancor, it's probably pretty weak minded.

21. Why did he throw a rock at the button instead of using force push? I guess there's no evidence that he actually CAN use force push, only pull.

22. that poor guy, look killed his puppy.

23. the person who would get the most enjoyment out of Leia's outfit is the only one who cannot see. oh irony.

24. them banthas are on their way to the sarlacc pit. A bantha loves a good execution in the morning.

25. some of these new additions to the movie like the sarlacc simply feel like Lucas had no faith in his original film, like he spent 20 years feeling like nobody could like it, despite its popularity.

26. slight alteration in the script; when luke is standing there with his hand in the air waiting for the light saber Boba Fett shoots him. the end.

27. after all this time being a mysterious badass bounty hunter and Boba goes out like a punk.

28. Leia's gotta be damn strong to strangle him to death through all that fat.

29. the blind guys probably not the best one to be saving Lando.

30. that was a damn good shot. if Luke's hand wasn't made of metal it would have been an incapacitating shot.

31. and that folks is why alcohol is bad. they shoot one end of the ship and the chain reaction from all the booze blows up the whole ship.

32. 'an old friend' must literally be referring to his age because if you think about it he was only training with him for a week, if that, and it's been at most a couple months since they met.

33. its impressive that the Emperor looks older here than in the movies considering the order of the creation and considering its the same actor.

34. maybe if you'd lived on a world with healthcare it wouldn't be so bad, Yoda.

35. no other jedi was forced to confront a full on sith lord to stop being a padawan! this seems very unreasonable of Yoda.

36. I love how Yoda tries to avoid the question.

37. gotta say, killing jedi does mean for a real easy body clean up.

38. From a certain point of view.

39. Everything that Obi Wan is saying is TECHNICALLY true, but not exactly.

40. this whole section about Luke having a sister feels like it should be a big reveal moment, but it's handed over like 'oh btw here's info you should know.'

41. it's sad to know that all the other coloured mon calamari were killed before this movie. I'm assuming that's why there were different coloured ones in rogue one, but they all look identical in this one.

42. I feel like Solo is a bad choice of general to do the strike team. He's the best pilot not the best soldier. Also Leia's a weird choice to go on a mission like this. she's a leader not an operative.

43. The millennium Falcon should really be crewed by 7. pilot, copilot, weapons officer, navigation, 2 gunners and an engineer (or an astromech would work) I wonder if he has the full crew with him.

44. they got very close for people trying to keep their distance.

45. there really is no reason they should bring 3-po. and he's not exactly high camo.

46. the way the 2 more speeder troopers were just watching waiting makes me laugh.

47. when you turn and there's a giant tree stump about to blow you up maybe turn instead of screaming for 5 seconds.

48. they travelled a long way on those speeders, that's gonna be a hell of a hike back.

49. oh look its a low budget wookie.

50. food, the best way to an alien creatures heart.

51. That little ewok, Wicket W. Warwick, is the 11 year old Warwick Davis. I thought you ought to know.

52. Do you think that the emperor actually knew about the small rebel force or do you think he just wanted to be mysterious.

53. Chewbacca is supposed to be intelligent. he should be able to tell a trap when he sees one. or at least not want to eat things just lying around.

54. R2, king of 'oh ffs, I'll do it.

55. what were the ewoks waiting for? they captured them but didn't show up until they freed themselves.

56. someone must have brought a protocol droid to the forest moon of endor and they thought it was a god some time in the past.

57. People think the Ewoks are all cute and happy and friendly but remember they were originally going to eat the film's protagonists.

58. some deity, he gives orders and they just ignore him.

59. I don't blame R2 for tasing them.

60. that's Warwick davis 'humping' Han solo's leg there.

 61. Han solo's kinda a douche.

62. Leia cannot remember her real mother. and I don't think Leia would know what Luke means by 'real mother'. Do you think that Leia even knew that she was adopted.

63. 'i felt his presence.' the line that spawned a thousand Christmas jokes.

64. "You'll learn to use it as I have." No she won't, count on that.

65. 'somehow I've always known' then why did you make out with your brother?

66. I wonder where Luke got the Kyber crystal for his lightsaber.

67. i like how that giant satellite dish has a bunch of smaller satellite dishes.

68. What is the purpose of the secret entrance on the other side of the ridge?

69. is it me or does the emperor's throne room look like it's just a storage room that they haven't finished clearing out?

70. I can't tell if The Emperor is a stereotype or if this is why that is a stereotype.

71. it's a shame that none of the rebels have radios, if they did they could have waited for Han to tell them that the shield was down.

72. Itsh a Trap!

73. that was a nice religious war you just started R2. get the ewoks god in danger and they attack.

74. is it just me or should the arrows of a bunch of savages just bounce off the armour designer to stop low impact blaster shots?

75. smart move this time; make the guns work on the battlestation first, not last.

76. how did the blast go through the shield? is it a one way shield?

77. Han shows no emotion or care that R2 basically just died.

78. poor nameless ewok, we hardly... we didn't remotely know thee.

79. how do the ewoks know how to pilot that thing? wtf?

80. Hey! Luke has the high ground! Awesome he just won i think.

81. Nevermind, Vader is wise to that trick now, he removed the high ground.

82. they have blasters, the ewoks have tiny people sized spears. just kill them all.

83. vader threatening Leia and getting his arm cut off is a prime example of 'talk shit, get hit.'

84. it wasn't exactly an even exchange though. Ani lost a robo hand he'd already lost, Luke lost his actual hand.

85. When I was a kid because I was scared of Empire strikes back and didn't watch it much I thought that when he cut off Vader's hand it had somehow fused to his wrist.

86. That's a big explosion for the amount of charges they placed.

87. This is a weird statement; I assume Anakin had his penis burned off and has no ability to have more kids, otherwise they would have made a little vader army, right?

88. it IS impressive how they manage to make Vader look so emotive despite that mask.

89. it was always the lightning in Luke's teeth that made me cringe most.

90. I wonder if Vader's dying because of the electricity, or because the Emperor was using Darth plagueis' life saving force magic to keep him alive.

91. in the first movie they had to shoot down a tiny exhaust vent, in this movie you can take a whole ship down.

92. how does luke know that the removal of the mask will kill him?

93. I swear laser fire just came from a place on the falcon that there were no guns.

94. she's super ambiguous about that whole loving luke thing, like Han is supposed to know that they're siblings. 'obviously I love him' how is he supposed to know you mean sisterly love?

95. I feel like Luke would have removed the vader gear before the funeral. a symbol that when he died and is now being cremated it is as anakin, not vader.

96. I don't know what all these cities are so happy about, they still have a ton of imperial leaders and armies that are in control, just cos the death stars gone and so is the emperor doesn't mean you can relax.

97. the ewok/rebellion party is one of the most awkward things in the history of movies

98. the pilots should really find some place to put their helmets.

99. in episode 3 they make it very clear you need special training to do the return from the dead ghost thing. but Anakin just does it. weird.

100. I absolutely hate the fact that they put in Hayden Christensen's Anakin in as the ghost at the end. He absolutely would not look like that,, he was 30 years older. I get putting a more light side version, but what they did originally was perfect. he doesn't get younger!

That is the end of the original trilogy.

I still have one or 2 that I've done so stay tuned.

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